A Different Perspective

Okay Readers, I am going to be 100% completely real with you at the moment. Today is the 21st of March and the last few days have been incredibly surreal. My week started Sunday night when I got a call from my boss informing me that I had been laid off due to COVID-19 and a lack of business. My boss wanted to make sure that I understood that this was not a personal work issue, but being in the transportation business, I had known this was coming. I held it together while I was on the phone with him; but when I hung up I was filled with worry, panic and sadness. In fact I ended up walking into the bedroom and sobbing (really it was ugly crying) into my husbands chest. Despite knowing that this might happen I was still shook to my core. I no longer had a paycheck… We have four people in our household and I for some reason felt like I had let them down. I wouldn’t be able to pull my weight. I wasn’t sure with everything going on whether or not I would be able to get another job. I was scared.

Over the last week, I have watched as the world has changed drastically. I know there are many people who are having the experience that I had Sunday. I know there are many more who are yet to have this experience. This virus and its contagious nature have the entire world concerned and taking measures to help slow its progress and hopefully stem the growth of deaths within the population. It is surreal, at times I alternate between feeling like I am in a video game or in a movie, a lot of it doesn’t feel real. As I sit an write this the current numbers for Colorado included 363 cases spread across 24 counties, with 44 hospitalized and 4 deaths. The beginning of the week we had only 117 cases state wide. I felt lost and disempowered after my lay off. I did not know what to do really. So, I did what most of us do and I wallowed for a couple days (while applying for jobs online, and putting in my application for unemployment; at least it would be a little help).

I slept for almost a whole day, what point was there to getting up. Then yesterday something clicked… for months , since we moved into our new house I have been wanting to spend sometime straightening up, clearing away the clutter we were unable to deal with due to the rapid nature of our move, I have been thinking about working on my spiritual practice, creating a ciriculum and getting back into meditation. I had been yearning to work on a childhood dream and attempt to write soemthing I felt worthy of submitting to a publisher. Yet I had never seemed to find the time or the energy at the same moment. Yesterday, it hit me, yes this may be a forced quarrentine, yes this may be a crazy time in human history and yes as I have said to many of my friends, I don’t think life as we knew it before this will exist after we come out the other side, But this may also be an opportunity.

Life as we know it may not exist on the other side of this… That has a lot of negative connotations, but what if we look at it from a different perspective? What if we look at the possible positive ramifications of this situation and make the most of this time. Take the time to slow down, care for ourselves, get more in tune with our spirituality, practice our magic, meditate, organize our space and make time and space for our families and the Divine? Amazing amounts of creativity and good could come out of this. We could find ourselves, more conscious of the well being of those around us, less likely to take “normal” interaction for granted. We could do so many things with this time. Deepen our understanding of our own spiritual paths and of ourselves; without the hustle and bustle of the world around us. We can create better routines, routines that include meditation, contemplation, creative expression. What if this time is the gestation period for a new more aware society? What if we use this time to better ourselves? What might the world become with humans in it that listen to their own inner voice?

This is the kernel of hope I can offer those around me, this is the suggestion I can whisper on this page to those who will listen and perhaps this is the reason I have made all of the choices I have made up until this time. So that in this difficult time I can help be a voice of calm and focused reason, so that I can help to remind those who happen across my page that we can take this gargantuan life changing event and use it to a good advantage. While I struggle with my own ups and downs (that happens when you are bipolar!) I will make my best effort to share something everyday, especially during this trial, to help focus us toward thinking about what positive there can be for us even in a difficult time. I ask my readers to join in this conversation, what things are you doing that you wouldn’t have time for otherwise that have brought you joy amidst the fear and apprehension our world is experiencing? What things have you wanted to do that you just didn’t have the time for that you can do now?

Let’s spend this time expoloring together and find our path through this dark night.