This year started out like gang busters for me. Around 9:30 PM I said good night to my husband, as he was leaving for a huntiung trip the next morning. Then I logged on and had a Zoom call with a very dear friend and mentor who was calling me from the Future. She literally lives on the other side of the world and we time travel to meet each other as close to every week as we can. This time it had been about a month since we spoke, I had wanted to spend some quiet time with my husband before the holiday insanity rolled around, then she had a personal loss and needed to do what she had to do to take care of herself, and then the busiest week of my year started. In my household we are multi-cultural and multi-faceted I guess you could say. Myself and my husband describe ourselves as Pagan/Heathen, the grumpy growling demon that lives in my attice (as I so lovingly call my 21 year old) is somewhat agnostic with a penchant for working with the Fae. My mother describes herself as witch and leans a little more to the ceremonial while I am firmly estatic and her “special friend” as my great grandmother would call him is Christian. (And yes we all live on the same property- mother-in-law cottages are a miraculous thing for miltigenerational living). Now, I explain all this to give you some kind of idea the amount of chaos that goes on in this household during the winter holiday season. We celebrate Yule together as a family, as well asn Modranacht, and Jolabokkanacht.(all of these I will give more information on at another time) then on Christmas Eve my husband’s side of the family comes over for their traditional spaghetti dinner and gift exchange game. This year that meant there were 27 people in my house at one time. (I am so looking forward to my Sister-in-law hosting once she get a house now that they have moved back to the area) Once we finished that we cleaned up, I took a nap and then we headed to my stepfathers (my mom is divorced but his family is family and a great blessing to us) for Noche Buena (another tradition I will take time to explain at another time) After getting back from Noche Buena we get a few hours of sleep and then start cooking for my side of the family (which is not as big) to come over for Christmas day. Exchanging presents (even though everyone thinks we won’t have much) usually takes a minimum of three hours because we enjoy unwrapping them one at a time and seeing what everyone got, then we eat and play some cards before everyone goes to their respective homes fat, happy and exhausted. Lucky, for me that my company celebrates Boxing day and we get the day after Christmas off as well and this year we did boxing day up right- never getting out of our PJs and stuffing ourselves with leftovers before turning in early.
This brings us to my New Year’s Eve call- which outside of ringing in the New Year with my husband- was the best way I could think to see the New Year in. As I said I had a video call with a friend and mentor, who I knew years ago and whom had recently reached back out to me. This woman is amazing and is an inspiration to me and I am so glad I got to spend this time with her. After my call I stayed up to see my husband off on his hunting trip and then settled down to sleep New’s day.
We got a decent amount of snow that day/night and the world was snow covered when I woke up the next day to go to work. I am, a Native Coloradoan and barring black ice and five feet of snow I can pretty much get where I need to go in most weather. So I clean off my car, fall during the process and get up and go into work. Now, I am a western woman and I have a pretty much shake it off attitude with things like falls. I have always been the one to just get back up and do what needed to be done, which is why I thought nothing of going into work that day. However, four and a half hours into my day my 42 year old body decided that it wasn’t there for just trucking along and my back and shoulder hurt so badly I couldn’t finish the day out and I came home early. Jan. 3rd saw me struggling to function as pain had kept me up all night and so I called in. That night I finally had some relief and I woke up feeling refreshed…until I got to a mirror. While there was no pain one half of my face was swollen about three times its normal size making it difficult to keep my eye open. Freaking out over the swelling and the scary lack of discomfort, from what was described by my husband as looking like I went three rounds with Mike Tyson and didn’t block a single hit. I decided I needed to go to urgent care or the ER. I went to get in my car and it wouldn’t start. Panick ensued and when my mother didn’t respond the way I think I needed I got into a minor tiff with her; woke up my kid and had her drive me to the ER. After an examination and a CT scan of my head (which unfortunately didn’t give as much inofrmation as it could have because I am a;;ergic to contrast and so the image wasn’t as clear as it could be) It was determined that I had a severe infection of either my sinuses or dental and I was given antibiotics, pain meds (?- still not sure why since part of what freaked me out was the lack of pain) and some steriods to ease the swelling. We go to pick up my perscription and my insurance company had a company wide glitch and my insurance wasn’t able to be verified. So, I pay out of pocket for my medicine and go home to sleep. The next day I go into work with my face still slightly swollen but feeling better.
At the same time my husband’s hunting trip is going south and includes his truck getting stuck in a ditch and he decides to come home early which coincides with my ER day. (If this isn’t the Universe telling us we shouldn’t spend time apart I don’t know what is!)
Now my job has hit some difficulties recently and has been a little more stressful and I don’t belive in coincidences. During our Yule get together I worked a little magic and I began to wonder if the Universe was trying to tell me something as it attempted to keep me from my job almost the entire first week of this year. So this has me thinking… What is the lesson here what am I not seeing, perhaps I should be looking for change? Or maybe all of this was about helping me to begin focusing on what is important. So, I spent sometime meditating and prioritizing and I think I have a handle on it now, We are working to clean out clutter from our house and improve the energy flow, I am working on spiritual things and new goals daily. I am beginning to look at my job (don’t get me wrong I love the company I work for and the work I do) however, I had stopped writing to focus on that job over the last (hence no posts since I started) and was putting all my energy in that direction. After a few days I began to see; my job is a vehicle to help me achieve the other things that I feel I am meant to do and I was having a serious Frith Break. (there is an older blog on this topic for reference). So after I recovered I am now focusing on what is important. My job is a means to an end; a manner in which to secure my necessities while I work on other things like my book and this blog and make plans for some other pursuits for the future.
The Gods teach us and guide us in ways we may never expect. Sometimes it is gently, others it is a little more intense (especially, if you are not paying attention). But , so far I have learned this year, that I need to focus on and make time for the things that truly fulfill me, be better at staying in contact with the people I care about and make a few changes so that I can plan and make other dreams realities. While the beginning of this year came in with a bang for me personally, I find myself still very grateful for many things and that is an energy I want to hold onto. Though I will admit it is a difficult task for me somethings, especially when things are going wrong. But looking back I can see I had a job that was compassionate with my need for time off even though we are short staffed at the moment and I work with amazing people who truly care if you are okay and understand that sometimes we aren’t. I have a support system that even if I get a little antsy with them are still there for me. I have a strong, opinionated, independent kid that is amazing. A loving husband, the house of my dreams and none of these hiccups were major crises. All in all I am doing alright. and Now I am awake and aware to what needs to be done and focused in the right direction. Hopefully this is a lesson I don’t have to learn again.
So readers, I encourage you to look for the lesson in any difficulty you are going through, and find the blessings you have as well. And if you you are truly struggling, please don’t be afraid to ask for help. We all need some help sometimes and there is no shame in that. In fact, if we all got more comfortable with giving and receiving assistance from others…how much better could our world be? Take some time today and find your lessos, and blessings, if you need to write them down and post them where you can see them to remind yourself of the path you are on. Then go a step further and allow yourself to dream about what may be possible- make note of these and find your plan. Then go for it!
The Frith Wytch 