Stillness…

I had a situation come up this week that was quite upsetting, and my immediate instinct was to lash out and honestly cause as much damage as possible. If I am honest with myself and my readers, just a couple of years ago, that would have been my EXACT response. However, this time I took a deep breath, walked away and spoke to my husband and asked his advisement. He pointed out to me that outside of destructive action there was nothing that I could in that moment that would make the situation better so sit on it for a a little bit.

Sometimes, we need to take that separation and that time of stillness to reflect and consider the options available to us. As I thought about it I did see how my inital instinctual reaction would be nothing but destructive. It would not truly address the situation, and might also make my own personal situation worse. I was able to take time to consider the consequences of what I wanted to do; weigh the benefits viersus the cost and I made a very different decision than I would have previously taken.

Many times we are encouraged to be “quick on our feet” and “decisive” as opposed to thinking and considering our reactions . However, I have found few instances (barring emergencies) that do not allow for a little consideration. However, it is difficult sometimes to take that time because we are told constantly that we should be decisive, we should know and act. Take time for careful consideration, when you have the luxury, can actually improve the outcome and our interactions with each other. We just need to take the time and begin to unravel the toxic “Right Now” messaging that we get in our daily lives.

Whether we belive it or not there are many things that influence our reactions to stimuli (both good and bad). Advertising , regularly encourages us to “Act Now!” or “Act Fast before…” This is because the makers of that product or service would like to get your money before you talk yourself out of it by consideration. This has bled over into the way we view people outside of retail/marketing. If we are faced with a difficult situation at work and a co-worker or supervisor says something like “Please give me a minute to think.” we begin to quiestion their capacity within their role; when in truth is is the exact attitude that will more than likely make them highly more successful in their endeavors because they are thinking things through.

Contemplation is a lost art in our society and one I firmly believe we should resurrect,not only in our personal lives but expecially in our professional lives. I belive it is even more important in our spiritual lives. Contemplating and thinking through the ramifications of a situation does not make you weak, or unsure. It makes you clever, because you are assessing the information provided as well as the possible effects each different decsion would bring. In this way you can choose the best appropriate action and prepare for foreseeable difficulties and fall out.

Contemplation can lead to so many insights, can raise your confidence in your decision making and help you to be more successful. On a spiritual level it can give you time to consult your Inner Divine Guide, your spirit allies, beloved dead/ancestors and dieties, which may be able to provide you with more information. It can also lead you to self awareness which to me is one of the biggest part of shadow work.

Self awareness of your parts; all your parts, positive, destructive, orderly and chaotic is some major work to take on, It is important though. It is also a lost art. These are things that I think we need to get back to. Yes, we live in a world where information, innovation, and gratification move at faster speeds than ever before, but I have noticed that within that speed many different past habits, and techniques for understanding our world, ourselves and where we are going have been forgotten. In this time when we move faster than we ever had before I hear many people who are less than satisfied with their lives. It is partly my belief that this is a direct result of hurried decision making. We rush into relationships, belief systems,decisions and actions without slowing down to think them through. Most people are only still when they sleep (some of us unfortinately, aren’t even still then- my subconscious happens to like to get up up, walk around, maybe smoke a cigarette, eat a meal and have conversations while I am asleep- thank goodness I have a wonderful spouse and kid who keep an eye on me!) We need to create moments of stillness for contemplation within our lives.

Stillness is the medium in which our Inner Divine Guide speaks to us. As one close family friend is fond of saying “God is the space in-between”. This is one of my favorite quotes about the Divine Creative force of the Universe because it is very true. There is space between the molecules of an atom that can’t be quantified at this pointl it is one of the unknowables. So the Divine is found within the space between two breaths, tow steps or one action and the next. When we seek out the guidance of the Divine, it makes more sense to go to it, where it exists than to expect it to come to us.

There are many different ways to create stillness in our lives while getting things done. In fact, studies have proven that people who take breaks and include practices that encourage stillness into thier lives, end up being more productive. Which is one of the main things we all berate ourselves for when we seek stillness (or at least my Inner Critic does), we aren’t being productive. Again, I will state that this is a Post-Industrial Capitalistic view of the world and ourselves. Capitalism has told us for decades that if we aren’t being productive then we are wasting time. It seems the only time society at large wants us to be still is when we are children, otherwise we should be going doing experiencing. Which makes me wonder if we were able to move and explore as children if we wouldn’t feel the need to do as much moving as adults.

Stillness can be just as productive, as stated before, it can help you make better choices, and truly think through decisions so that we are not acting rashly.

So today, take a look at what you can change to include stillness in your life. It may be something as easy as setting down the phone or tablet and disconnecting for five minutes; getting up 5 minutes earlier, going to bed five minutes later. However, you can manage it, over the next week make 5 minutes in your day to simply be still; no music, no TV, no social media, no other tasks. Just sit, breathe and be. See what changes come up for you.